27 August 2010

And This Guy Criticises Youngsters For Their Taste !

Sometimes, like during the last few weeks, I struggle for something to write about and then, out of the blue, one of my favourite subjects pops up and it’s manna from heaven.

If I tell you it’s a footballer (and this is where the girls switch off – or so J says) and his taste in just about everything is so bad, you feel physically sick, you’ll know it’s good old Stephen Ireland featuring again. You may already have worked it out from the photo above, although that stupid hoodie he’s wearing might have confused you a bit. Why doesn’t the idiot just wear a burka if he wants to look a prat? It’s probably the car that allowed you to guess who it was anyway.

Now, I don’t have anything personal against Mr Ireland. He hasn’t scored a hat-trick of goals against my team nor crocked one of our best players, in fact I don’t think he’s even played against Rangers, it’s just that the guy is a 100 carat dipstick, a total wazzock, a stunning example of what can happen to a young man, when his wealth overtakes his ability to handle it sensibly and the size of his ego overtakes that of his bank balance.

So what’s he up to now? Well his last team, Manchester City, decided to trade him for an Aston Villa player, and once on Villa soil, Mr Ireland let rip at his previous employers and his former teammates, castigating young reserve footballers for coming to ‘work’ with £10,000 watches on their wrists.
This, from the guy who has a £10,000 fish tank installed in his bedroom, and who, reputedly, is trying to find a firm to install a glass floor in his kitchen under which he’ll have sharks swimming in a tank! You couldn’t make it up!

This is the guy who told so many porkies, particularly when he did not want to represent his country, Ireland, that eventually the authorities worked out that all three of his grandmothers had died – yup – all three! The game was up after that.

But of course, his main crime against humanity is what he does to cars. Now I love, just love the Audi R8, and having seen what he’s done to his (see picture), I actually think I’ll get a flight to Birmingham and tell him what I think of his taste. It stinks.

See this other post about Mr Ireland and his love of ruining nice cars:

And talking of guys who have absolutely no taste, Nigel has recounted a story of when he went on a client trip to the Netherlands. See what he has to say at the following URL:

1 comment:

Allison said...

Ugh, he has destroyed that car! I love the way you write, Tom - you always make me laugh with your hysterical descriptions of people :)