You see he had been on an outing to the courts. One of many really good school initiatives they run throughout the year.
Anyway, my advice to him about the courts reminded me of a particularly amusing episode which happened to me (well I thought so) quite a few years back. I had already been told I’d been successful in my application for a job with IBM in
Because of advice I got and because I’d never been to court before (honest guv) I thought it would be quite interesting to attend in person. Problem was when I got my court date it was on the day I was starting with IBM. Here I was, starting the job of my dreams and the first thing I was doing was going to court, albeit only for a motoring offence. I phoned my manager and said I had some personal business and that I recognised it was my first day and that I’d appreciate the morning off. It wasn’t a problem. He said we’d meet for lunch after I got back to the office.
When the morning arrived, I set off for
He took me up some stairs , through a small door, up some more stairs and eventually into a dingy little room at the end of a corridor which I’m sure smelled of stale urine.
Once he’d hung his coat up, he introduced himself as Nigel and asked if I’d be going there regularly. I said I hoped not. ‘If you come here regularly, you’ll have to chip into the tea and coffee fund’, he said. ‘And the magistrates usually finish about 11.30 so we’ll all be able to go off and have a curry up on
As I wondered silently what he was talking about, a smart woman appeared. ‘This is Jenny’, he said. ‘Jenny, this is ….sorry what’s your name and what case are you representing’?. ‘I’m representing myself’, I replied. ‘I’m up before the beaks for….’.
I never got to finish my sentence. In an instant, Nigel’s face turned a sort of grey, ashen colour. He grabbed my briefcase, thrust it into my hand and pushed me towards the door. ‘This is the lawyer’s room’, he said. ‘I’m afraid there’s been a terrible mistake. Don’t ever come up here again’.
Later that morning, after the guy in front of me was given a £5 fine for riding his moped down the crowded pavement in
'£20 fine', the magistrate said. 'And make sure you pay before you leave'. I reckon good old Nigel had had a word with m'lud - don't you?