Real Food, Real Food
The pressure was unrelenting. It started on the Thursday night, continued all day Friday and it was the first thing I heard when I woke up on Saturday morning. ‘Are you going for a boys’ lunch’ ? In this case, the boys were myself and Guy. I had innocently suggested, earlier in the week, that we needed to get some protein into our bodies after being on the dry cardboard and shredded duvet diet for the previous 10 days.
And so it continued all Saturday morning. In matters like this when I know there is an alternative agenda I can play a very subtle game. On the other hand Julie is about as subtle as a flying brick ! And so I prevaricated right up until about midday saying I could not be bothered showering and changing (I’d been doing some painting) when I was finally undone by Guy’s heartfelt plea, ‘Thomas can we go for some real food please’. Well my heart melted, I showered and changed quickly and off we went to the Midi which is our local bar which serves good, simple food…..oh and nice cheap wine as well. Just Guy and me on my scooter. Julie and Kitty were going off on another retail therapy jaunt – well you can’t blame them – it was pay day yesterday and we cant have money sitting around in the bank – can we ?
I got a Daily Mail, Guy got a computer mag. I got a packet of cigarettes and a pitcher of wine. Guy got a coke. And we sat there in the sun on the outside terrace of the Midi enjoying life. We’d read a bit then talk a bit. We’d read a bit more and then the food came. Egg and Bacon Skillet for Guy and Courgette Quiche pour moi. Frites with both of course. A basket of bread and lashings of mayonnaise. Scrummy.
We said the exact same thing almost simultaneously as the first forkfuls of food hit our taste buds. ‘Real Food, Real Food’ . Once we’d reacquainted our bodies with some protein, we started to discuss what the ‘girls’ might be doing. We were unanimous in our view that they’d head to that housewife’s graveyard, Cap 3000, the humongous shopping mall down on the coast. I wouldn’t say that Julie is hooked on the place but she has made it known that when her time on this earth has come to an end, she would like her cremated remains to be put into the air conditioning distribution unit at Cap 3000 so that even in death, she can grace all those shops which she so enjoyed in life.
Anyway, it was a given that that’s where they would be but what would they eat ? I suggested that Julie would have lobster after all it was pay day yesterday. Guy was a bit less specific and said they would head for the gourmet mall and that ‘Mummy ‘wouldn’t spend that much’.
We finished our lunch and headed home. About 5 hours later the girls came through the door and asked if we could open up the loading bay so they could unload their purchases. I’m quite a good forklift truck driver so it only took me a few hours to unload the ‘shopping’ and then the coup de grace. I said, ‘what did you have for lunch dear’ ? ‘Oysters’ was the reply.
Nuff said !
The pressure was unrelenting. It started on the Thursday night, continued all day Friday and it was the first thing I heard when I woke up on Saturday morning. ‘Are you going for a boys’ lunch’ ? In this case, the boys were myself and Guy. I had innocently suggested, earlier in the week, that we needed to get some protein into our bodies after being on the dry cardboard and shredded duvet diet for the previous 10 days.
And so it continued all Saturday morning. In matters like this when I know there is an alternative agenda I can play a very subtle game. On the other hand Julie is about as subtle as a flying brick ! And so I prevaricated right up until about midday saying I could not be bothered showering and changing (I’d been doing some painting) when I was finally undone by Guy’s heartfelt plea, ‘Thomas can we go for some real food please’. Well my heart melted, I showered and changed quickly and off we went to the Midi which is our local bar which serves good, simple food…..oh and nice cheap wine as well. Just Guy and me on my scooter. Julie and Kitty were going off on another retail therapy jaunt – well you can’t blame them – it was pay day yesterday and we cant have money sitting around in the bank – can we ?
I got a Daily Mail, Guy got a computer mag. I got a packet of cigarettes and a pitcher of wine. Guy got a coke. And we sat there in the sun on the outside terrace of the Midi enjoying life. We’d read a bit then talk a bit. We’d read a bit more and then the food came. Egg and Bacon Skillet for Guy and Courgette Quiche pour moi. Frites with both of course. A basket of bread and lashings of mayonnaise. Scrummy.
We said the exact same thing almost simultaneously as the first forkfuls of food hit our taste buds. ‘Real Food, Real Food’ . Once we’d reacquainted our bodies with some protein, we started to discuss what the ‘girls’ might be doing. We were unanimous in our view that they’d head to that housewife’s graveyard, Cap 3000, the humongous shopping mall down on the coast. I wouldn’t say that Julie is hooked on the place but she has made it known that when her time on this earth has come to an end, she would like her cremated remains to be put into the air conditioning distribution unit at Cap 3000 so that even in death, she can grace all those shops which she so enjoyed in life.
Anyway, it was a given that that’s where they would be but what would they eat ? I suggested that Julie would have lobster after all it was pay day yesterday. Guy was a bit less specific and said they would head for the gourmet mall and that ‘Mummy ‘wouldn’t spend that much’.
We finished our lunch and headed home. About 5 hours later the girls came through the door and asked if we could open up the loading bay so they could unload their purchases. I’m quite a good forklift truck driver so it only took me a few hours to unload the ‘shopping’ and then the coup de grace. I said, ‘what did you have for lunch dear’ ? ‘Oysters’ was the reply.
Nuff said !
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