Would You Buy A Used Car From Any Of Them ?

It was an historic occasion. The UK’s three main party leaders slugging it out in front of the nation on live TV for the first time. The indications are that a surprise result is on the cards (I only saw instant poll results last night) but the result is not the main purpose of this post.

No, what if a person neither saw the programme or had ever heard or seen our esteemed party leaders and had to decide on their vote, simply by looking at the photographs above – what would they think?

I am terribly guilty at forming first impressions. I can look at somebody across a crowded room and decide that there is no way I’m going to talk to them. This was a particular problem when I was in sales – how many times did I sit down in front of a potential customer and bite my lip because I couldn’t stand the person – even after only 2 minutes?

And I have to say that generally my judgement is proved right. The number of times, I’ve actually persevered with a relationship, either potential client or potential friend and found out that I couldn’t really stand the person is beyond number. Of course, maybe it’s just me?

Anyway, back to the photographs above – you have to decide who you’re going to vote for and let me say right here and now that the photos are from a ‘neutral’ paper when it comes to political allegiences so nobody is cast in either a favourable or unfavourable light.

Right – candidate number one – starting from the right – a Mr Gordon Brown. Shifty. The hooded eyes tell you that the guy is a weasel and cannot be trusted. The thick hair swept to the side shows a complete disregard for fashion despite the fact that he appears to be wearing a rather expensive shirt. The thick and slightly uneven knotted tie shows a desire to do things quickly even when the world will be watching him. The 5-o’clock shadow makes him appear sinister and the shape of the mouth basically says, ‘don’t mess with me’. The jowelly face and saggy eyes shows someone who has a complete disregard for their personal appearance with the bushy, unkempt eyebrows simply reinforcing that view. Summary – not a person to be trusted.

Candidate number two – in the middle – A Mr David Cameron. Smug and preppy. The swept back hair shows someone trying too hard to be modern. He’s wearing a cheap shirt and the right hand collar is slightly turned up showing that despite the hair and the shaped eyebrows, clothes do not figure highly in his list of priorities. The tightly drawn, thin lipped mouth indicates a certain contempt and that he will prevail – no matter what. The tightly knotted, bright blue tie worn with a dark blue suit shows someone trying to be noticed even if it’s for the wrong reasons. Summary – if I saw him at a party, he’d be last on my list to talk to.

Candidate number three – on the left – a Mr Nick Clegg. Personable, free and easy, approachable. The open mouth and slight smile shows a certain confidence. The well but not over-groomed hair and the carelessly knotted bright yellow/gold tie shows he’s comfortable in his own skin. Summary – looks like a friendly guy and someone you could have a drink with down the pub on a Friday night.

So – look at the photographs once more – who would you buy a used car from?

Julie's Final Blog From Kenya

Wednesday 7th April - I awoke early worrying about the little boy, Felix, whom I’d met the previous evening. Why hadn't I taken some biscuits in my rucksack, why didn't I give him more bread when I had the chance?

I signed on to the internet. It was only 5:49 French time and I saw that Thomas was on line. Quickly I emailed him to say that Skype was out of the question - if I heard his voice, I would just cry even more. I was so full of despair for this poor little boy. I couldn't bear the thought of him going hungry until tomorrow evening and our next fellowship at Katchok, when he would possibly turn up.

In sharp contrast, we were due to take the girls out to the Impala Park and then for a fish meal afterwards. I managed to cheer myself up a bit with thoughts of seeing 'my' girls again - Ruth and her sisters, Violet , Maccy and Winny.

I spent most of my time with the youngest siblings of Ruth - 2 year old Elizabeth and 3 year old Christine. They were so happy to play with the balloons whilst the older girls touched my skin and played with my hair. Once they got bored of the few things I had in my makeup bag and trying on my lipstick, they investigated my iTouch and then played football and 'catch' like the boys.

It was a happy afternoon which continued with fish at Car Wash and party bags for the youngest amongst them with a promise of a present for each of the older girls, the following day.

In the evening, we took Moses and his wife, Tatu, out for a Thai meal. I so wanted to ask, even beg him to take little Felix into the program but knew that I had to bide my time and let things unfold in the correct manner.

Thursday 8^th April - I had a rendezvous with Florence as I wanted to do some shopping for the girls and hear about the (Felix) home visit that she and John had scheduled for earlier this morning.

Having spent a fortune in Kenyan terms at the Bata shoe shop, Florence and I sat having Iced coffee with a plate of masala chips whilst she began to tell me Felix's grim story.

He was almost 10 years old but was only 2 when his mother died from brain damage having been beaten up by her husband. Felix recalled that he had also had a younger sister who had also died. His father, now 70, and known by other villagers to be mentally sick, was never prosecuted.

Currently, Felix lives with his 70 year old grandmother who barely makes a living by ploughing the fields of neighbouring farms. His aunt and uncle and their 5 children live next door however they refuse to include him in their family life so Felix is rarely fed and is often beaten. In order to provide for himself, he has found work at the construction site digging up sand in order to pay for his meagre upkeep and school fees.

I wept as I leant of his sad life. I felt so strongly that God had pointed me in his direction.

John, who had accompanied Florence on the home visit , reported back that he knew of the boy, saying that on a couple of occasions he had run to (the other) John's house in Manyatta after he had been beaten. This journey (barefoot) would have taken him one and a half hours. Surely this boy fitted the profile perfectly for being brought into the Isaiah Trust programme?

That afternoon, I was due to be at Kibos with Moses to teach the boys some French. In actual fact, the time was spent with Moses giving him the background on Felix. Will he think I am over reacting and too emotional? What do I know of the situation? There are loads of boys probably with the same issues. But in my heart of hearts I knew that I was meant to bring little Felix to Moses's attention.

Moses said that in a situation like this, the ideal is to bring the boy into a family situation until his self esteem is strong enough for him to maybe attend a boarding school. However, I knew that the house was full as it was.

We ended the conversation with the agreement that if he was at Kachock that evening, then we would both go for a home visit the following morning. Thereafter, I tried to distance myself from Moses in an effort not to influence his decision making process.

Friday 9^th April – this morning we went to Nakumat to buy provisions to take to Felix's home. What would we find?

His grandmother's house was in a rural area which in part appeared quite affluent. I asked Moses about this? It looked great he said, but being on the flood plain, it is rife with Cholera and Typhoid - so much for fertile plains, I thought!

Eventually, we arrived there. The house itself was two simple rooms - an upturned wheelbarrow held a bowl for washing. Felix was alone and Moses questioned him closely. Before we left, I held Felix close and promised him that he would be leaving this place whatever - when I asked him if he wanted to be taken care of, away from this situation, he gave me his first word – ‘yes’.

On the way back to the car, as Felix walked ahead with John and Tom, my steps were slow and laboured, my heart was heavy with the despair I was feeling for Felix's situation. Then Moses joined me and said, ‘On Sunday Felix will come to church with Pamela (the mother of Michael of the glasses fame) and he will stay at the house at Kibos. He will be taken into the programme’.

My hands covered my eyes, I was overcome with emotion but I didn't cry, I just sobbed into Moses's shoulder such was my relief at finding this little 'lost' boy. That's Felix at the top of this posting.

Later that afternoon, I had such an overwhelming feeling that God had brought me to this point in my life whereby all my skills in my working life, all my skills as a mother, every ounce of experience I had ever had - all had been honed to this point. This was where I was meant to be.

My delight at attending the children's fellowship meeting the evening before and my high with the news of Felix's acceptance into the programme, was tempered by learning that John's 7 months old son had been taken into hospital during the night with Malaria.

Kisumu is a rollercoaster of emotions, joy and despair, hope then hopelessness.

Saturday 10^th April - All too soon it was time to leave to return to my other family with a simple promise to come back soon ,God willing, with Guy and Kitty. I left with letters full of greetings to their white brother and sister in France.

The flights back to Nice were not uneventful with a late departure from Nairobi, the dash to make the connecting flight in Paris and my case disappearing for 24 hours. All the sorts of things which would normally stress you out, but compared to what I had experienced during the previous 2 weeks, a walk in the park!

I Slept In Marilyn Monroe’s Bed (Possibly)

A Nevada casino once owned by Frank Sinatra and patronised by Hollywood stars and mobsters has closed amid plunging gambling rates and competition from Las Vegas. Even a visit from the renowned gambler, Thomas F Cupples III in the mid 90s did not save this icon of the gambling industry.

In addition to the legendary gambler Cupples, not even a star-spangled history and an association with the likes of Marilyn Monroe, Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Junior has been enough to save the Cal Neva Lodge Casino from the grim realities of the US casino industry.

The casino, which sits on Lake Tahoe near the California border, last year saw its revenues fall to about a half of what they were in 1992. Reputed to be America's oldest licensed casino, the Cal Neva opened in 1926 and hosted the 13-year-old Judy Garland's first performance nine years later.

However, its heyday was in the early 1960s when it was bought by Sinatra, reportedly in partnership with Sam Giancana, a Chicago mobster who enticed film stars, singers and Mafiosi to flock to its blackjack games and roulette tables. A network of underground tunnels, built to smuggle alcohol during Prohibition, allowed the VIP guests to move around the resort without being seen by the public.

Marilyn Monroe spent the last weekend of her life at the resort in 1962 as a guest of the Rat Pack actor Peter Lawford and his wife. However, a 1999 biography claimed Monroe was brought there to be threatened not to reveal her Mafia links, drugged in her cabin and photographed in compromising positions. Another popular Cal Neva rumour claims she used the resort for a tryst with John F Kennedy.

OK – so the ‘Cupples’ mention is a bit of poetic licence but I’ve been to the Cal Neva and I probably slept in Marilyn Monroe’s bed and bathed in her bath assuming she had the Honeymoon Cabin.

In 1993, on a house exchange with a lady from San Francisco, myself, my brother and my girlfriend at the time had been advised to drive up to Lake Tahoe. I have to say it was a magical drive taking us through the wine country (where we stopped at a vineyard to sample the fare – bad news when you’ve got another 3 hours to drive), fished in crystal clear rivers, had great food in wonderful scenery and ended up driving round Lake Tahoe quite late at night desperately looking for somewhere to stay.

Eventually we reached this sort of town which seemed to be entirely comprised of casinos and we drove into the first place which looked like a hotel and I remember saying to the receptionist we’d take anything they had. She was quite apologetic and said they had a wedding party and all they had left was, believe it or not, the honeymoon cabin (where Monroe reputedly stayed) and an adjoining room (for the bride’s mother ???).

We grabbed the keys, dumped our stuff and headed into the main body of the hotel to find that the complex was split in half. The restaurant (for late diners) and the casino were on the other side of the road which was in Nevada (which allowed gambling) whilst the accommodation was on the California side (which did not allow gambling). Crossing the road, we entered the casino and found the bride and groom from the afternoon’s ceremony sitting in full wedding gear playing slot machines – it was bizarre – they’d probably been there all afternoon and evening!

We had a fantastic dinner, drank some great wine and lost a few dollars on the tables and then headed back to our lakeside cabins. It was only in the morning that we could see the full beauty of the hotel’s position on Lake Tahoe – have a look at the URL below:

http://www.calnevaresort.com/

Cupples, Lunch for Fred Couples

Fred Couples at the 1992 Open

Watching the Masters Golf tournament at the weekend, I was astonished to see how well Fred Couples was playing. He’s been off the radar for quite a while, probably because he now qualifies for and plays on the ‘Seniors tour’, but he’s always been a favourite of mine, probably because for 40 years of my professional life, and despite being asked how my name was spelt, everybody would spell it ‘Couples’ anyway.

Couples is a terrifically popular golfer and for a couple of decades was the pro most amateurs said they would prefer to play a round with. Tiger Woods has obviously taken that accolade now and I suspect that his stories of ‘off green’ activities hasn’t diminished his appeal one iota. But Fred was always the fans' favourite.

I remember Couples was playing in the British Open at Muirfield quite a few years back (1992 actually) and I was watching his progress with some interest, not just because I followed him as a golfer but also because I’d actually played both courses and the courses were familiar to me.

Couples was in contention for the Open but then his wife was reported to have ‘hit a bar’ in the town, had drunk quite a bit and then had started stripping off whilst dancing on a table in the bar. Couples game went to pot after that and he did not win. Rumour has it that he deliberately played badly so he could go home and get away from the missus, which he did.

And it was during this time when his popularity was at its height when I went to play a round of golf with my mates. The course was out Beaconsfield way and we headed off into the restaurant for lunch prior to playing.

Lunch was ordered at a counter where you paid up-front and then you gave your name on the basis that the waitress would bring your food to you when it was ready.

‘What’s your name’, she asked. ‘Cupples’, I said. There wasn’t even a flicker of name recognition – she didn’t even look up from the counter to see if it was the famous golfer standing there but I distinctly saw her write it as ‘Couples’. ‘First name’, she asked. ‘Fred’, I lied. Still not a flicker of adulation.

About 20 minutes later, she was wandering around the restaurant with my lunch on a tray, shouting, ‘Fred Couples, lunch for Fred Couples’.

My mates were in stitches. The rest of the restaurant was in apoplexy – was he really there in their golf club?

Julie's 3rd Update From Kenya

He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young (Isaiah 40:11)

Easter Sunday – Sundays are so special in Kisumu. Everyone is putting on their Sunday best and rushing off to whichever church service they usually attend. We were heading out to Kibos for Fresh Manna church. As we arrived we could hear the service was well under way and it took about 30 minutes to greet everyone. Eventually Moses appeared dressed all in white. As we would be celebrating communion during the service, he asked us to prepare the bread and 'wine' and then painstakingly he showed me how to prepare the bread. ‘What should I do with the crusts?’ I asked. He looked at me enquiringly and handed me a plastic bag. ‘We'll eat them for breakfast,’ he said. Will I ever be able to throw a crust away again without thinking of him?

I've not really written anything about Moses or the two Johns or Paul James.

Moses is in charge of the house which takes care of around 17 boys. These are boys straight from the streets and who are brought into the Isaiah Trust programme. Under Moses’ guidance, they will be taught discipline, attend school and do lots of studying as well as regular chores.. Many of the boys in the programme had been existing in horrendous circumstances prior to being brought to Moses. Smoking 'bang' and glue sniffing are the main addictions that they arrive with. Once they have experienced some 'rehab', they move to Mambaleo which Paul James runs in a similar fashion. These are the older boys and Paul James prepares them for further studies and reintegration into society- hopefully helping them achieve some kind of self sufficiency.

The two Johns take the role of social workers. If a boy approaches the Trust for help, one of the two Johns will check out if the boy has a real need and if he does, brings them into the programme. Once admitted, both Johns keep a close eye on the boys’ overall welfare and schooling.

Each of these guys is a saint! We visited the house of one of the Johns in the Manatta slum district only the other day. I had expected that as these guys were employed that they would be living in some kind of house....but no, they live in similar conditions to the kids they are caring for, except that they get paid a regular salary. John has a wonderful smile on his face all of the time, so much so that you wonder if he is genuine. During the first school meetings he looked so laid back that he was sliding off his chair! It only took me two days to understand quite how big his heart really is. He and his wife Pheobe share a three room house which is actually a slum dwelling - no water, no sanitation, no legal electricity. Between them they have 4 children, the youngest 8 months old. On a day to day basis, John meets needy, vulnerable or abused children. Iin addition to his own family, John is unofficially 'fostering' another two boys and a young girl. John earns the equivalent of 80 euros a month.

Moses is a man who has a great deal of presence. The word charisma might have been invented just for him. He is a handsome man with a deep belly laugh and an infectious charm. As soon as he knew I lived in France, he insisted on me adding to his vocabulary on a daily basis, so we greet each other with ‘Bonjour’ and ‘comment ca va’ and the like. As well as being house father to the Kibos boys, he is the biological father to 4 adorable girls. He is also the Pastor at the Kibos Fresh Manna church, preaches from the heart, sings and plays guitar and has an insatiable thirst for knowledge.

Paul James is a slightly built man with a hesitancy and a shyness about him, until he gets up to preach. He works alongside the extrovert Moses, translating between English and Kiswahili in church. He always wants to practice speaking French. ‘How do you say I love you,’ he asks me.

As we walked to see to his goats, Paul James took me to one side to ask permission to call me Mama instead of by my name. He explained he felt uncomfortable calling me Julie and to call me Mama was giving me the respect he thought I deserved.What can I say to him....apart from ‘je t'aime’ of course!

Each of these guys is so special in their own right. I know now why I feel so safe having them around me in the middle of the slums.

And so we came to Church with the music reverberating in my ears. At one point, I got up out of my seat and moved to the back so I had more room around me to sing, dance and clap. I smiled at myself. I'm 'morphing' into Nicky I thought! Nicky and Kitty, my daughter will know what I mean. The music was fantastic and us girls even sang.

(Nicky is the co-founder of the Isaiah Trust and would have been on the trip but she became seriously ill only a few weeks before departure – she’s recovering fine now).

The Easter service was awesome - it lasted 4 hours!!! I will never complain about the 90 minute services at the International Baptist Church in St Paul again!! Ha ha!!

Easter Monday - The 'team' were getting together to play 5 aside football with the boys today. Fortunately, I had planned to go to visit Covenant House's orphanage.

Rather than go in the van, they suggested we take a boda boda. Oh I thought that's great -I've fancied a ride in one of the golf-cart like taxis. Unfortunately, my translation of boda boda was not too accurate and it was the bike taxi rather than the golf cart taxi. So I had no choice but to get my leg over the parcel shelf on the back and cling on for dear life on the 15 minute ride down hill. On numerous occasions my water bottle was jolted off my shoulder as we negotiated pot holes and trenches as well as other vehicles. It was almost as exhilarating as the time I hang-glided off a mountain in the French Alps. I had the same sense of wobbliness in my legs when I put them back on firm ground.

The orphanage was comprised of a group of buildings and dormitories which held the 'usual' groupings of either orphans or abandoned or mistreated kids. They gathered round as I sat on the floor with them and showed them how to draw around their hands. The older ones numbered their fingers then wrote their names on them, cut them out and pegged them to string around the room. Their reward for picking up the discarded paper from the floor was a chupa chup!

We were back home by 5 and the rest of the ‘team’ rolled in around 7:00 pm, each burnt to a crisp, having spent the day in full sun without any shelter. Unfortunately there was no water left for showers! A consolation was that Joshua once again, cooked us a wonderful evening meal.

PS. Just found out that 76 boys turned up to play football today!!

Tuesday 6th April - Off to the provincial hospital this morning with 8 year old Michael to try and get his eye problem diagnosed. Michael is one of 9 siblings but 4 of them died. His mother ekes out an existence on the dumps. I had a four hour wait at the hospital with Michael but we managed to get the staff to sort out his problem, which he says he’s had for five years! Result!

I was then collected by John and taken to visit Ruth (14) in the slum district where she lives. We couldn't get the jeep down the narrow lanes so there was no option but to bike it.

Had a BLAST of a day! I would have been a bit worried on my bike but John took excellent care of me - I even had two of the other guys as outriders (all ex street kids). I felt like I was in a James Bond film! We even stopped in a cafe for quick soda.

Off to a fellowship meeting on the dumps now - hopefully Michael will be the proud owner of some new glasses!

Wednesday 7th April - had a great day yesterday. It ended with a fellowship meeting on the dumps. Michael was there, standing at least 6 inches taller in his new glasses (picture above) - do you know he's been in pain for 5 years, bless him. I'm aware that my time is getting closer to an end here and it was my opportunity to stand up in front of the boys (and all my girls were there too - Violet, Immaculate and Ruth) to say goodbye to those I would not be seeing over the next few days. I explained how happy I was to be going home to my husband and family as I had missed them then my voice just broke as I tried to explain just how much I would miss my African family. Then I came out of the shack to help prepare the bread and juice. There must have been 50 kids milling around still taking part in the service and by now we were in pitch darkness. Just on the threshhold was a ragged little boy. You know how children put their head on their knees when they are tired? I bent down to him and asked if he was tired - he barely had the strength to lift his head. I brought him into the 'kitchen' and gave him 3 slices of bread which he ate so slowly. Then, with all the activity around the place and boys milling around, I lost him. I wanted to give him some more.

When we reached the jeep, I saw him again. I went over to see him and took Florence with me (she's one of the orphans that now receives a small salary to work for the trust). She bent down to talk to him and and translated for me. He was the eldest of 5, both parents apparently dead. They lived with their grandmother who tried to look after them but they had been without food many days. John was called over. ‘This is a genuine boy’, John said. ‘He is telling the truth. I bought him those shoes a couple of weeks ago when he was barefoot’.

The little boy just leaned into me and my heart broke. So that's why I'm awake at 5 am. Florence and John have promised to find him over the next two days so hopefully he can be brought into the Trust’s programme.