Hannah Montana

Now who is this girl? She’s on our telly all the time. Well from about 4.30pm until about 7pm when Kitty has absolute control of the remote! She sings, she dances and she acts and she’s quite cute, particularly in her blonde wig, although I mentioned the other day to Kitty that she was looking a bit podgy – not Kitty, Hannah Montana. Without a second’s hesitation Kitty said, ‘well that's cause she’s pregnant’. ‘Pregnant’, I replied. ‘She must only be about 16’. ‘Nah – she’s only 14’, said Kitty without batting an eyelid.

A couple of things to report before I go on. Hannah Montana who is actually a girl called Miley Cyrus, daughter of a ‘famous’ US country singing star, Billy Ray Cyrus, is only 15 years old and SHE IS NOT PREGNANT. It was one of these spoof stories which gets onto the internet and – whoosh – the whole world knows – even Kitty! Everbody except her biggest fan - me !

But the real point of this missive is to answer all of you who are wondering why a lazy, balding, fat, frequently drunk,  mean, geriatric, has-been (that’s J’s current description of me) is watching a 15 year old girl singer on the telly at 4.30pm.

It’s all to do with ‘remote wars’ you see and the utterly exhausting lives that both Kitty and I lead and which seem to coincide every day at approximately 4.30pm.

By 4.30pm ish I’ll have taken the kids down to the bus stop in the morning, made the bed, cleaned the house, washed and dried the dishes (the dishwasher blew up the other day), been down in the jungle clearing another square metre or two, have laid the fire, cut the wood, made my lunch, fed the dog and the cats, fixed something else in the house which needs repairing and then picked up Kitty from the bus stop after school.

Kitty for her part has gone to school, sat down all day and then come home.

And at precisely 4.37pm there is a battle royal for the TV remote control as we both sit exhausted on the sofa. Obviously, given my knowledge of Hannah Montana, who is Miley Cyrus or even Miley Stewart (her character on the show), I generally lose. But hey she’s a great little singer. See her at the following link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcMX-tXntS0&feature=related