Go Further With The ….The Lipo Car

Now you may think this is a monumental wind up, as I did, when I read the article. I thought it must be April 1^st, but no – it’s for real – read on and weep or laugh or be sick – whatever.

US authorities are investigating a Beverly Hills cosmetic surgeon who claims that he used fat he removed from patients in liposuction operations to power his "green" four-wheel-drive car. California's public health department has opened an inquiry into claims made by Dr Alan Bittner that he had turned fat removed from his patients into biodiesel. Mr Bittner wrote on his website: "The vast majority of my patients request that I use their fat for fuel - and I have more fat than I can use. "Not only do they get to lose their love handles or chubby belly, but they get to take part in saving the Earth." US business magazine Forbes reported that Dr Bittner used the "lipofuel" to power both his Ford Explorer car and his girlfriend's Lincoln Navigator.

When I picked myself up off the floor after rolling about laughing, I thought about the article and its implications.

Should Dr Bittner set up a cooperative which collects lipo fat from the various cosmetic surgeries in his state and set up a proper business where he can produce Lipo Fuel in greater, more economic quantities?

Would this business get to the stage where clinics pay patients for their Lipo Fat instead of charging them an ‘arm and a leg’ for their operations?

Should he move the business to Hawaii where the people are rather larger than average and there would be no shortage of Lipo Fat?

When he drives his car, what is the by product of the internal combustion process – does it smell like a KFC take-away?

When he does a lipo-operation is he tempted to suck all the patient’s fat out leaving them looking like a dried up mummy?

Does his car ever suffer from hardening of its cylinders or high cholesterol on its valves and will it eventually die of a heart attack or engine failure and does his car go to a heart surgeon rather than a garage for it service?

OK – by now you’re probably feeling rather queasy so I’ll stop but just remember, if you know anyone who has had the old lipo business then unknown to them they could be helping Dr Bittner and his girlfriend drive to the ‘eat all you like’ diner just down the road.